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This episode opens with all of the girls asleep. All are in their respective beds except for the twins who are sleeping with Flav.
In the confessional, Flav says he loves both of the twins equally, and that he dreads the day where he would be forced to split them up (Flav opening the episode is a bad omen).
Later on, Prototype talks to Black about her need to talk to Flav about his drinking because men who drink, obviously bother her.

In the kitchen, Seezinz explains she ordered breakfast from Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles for everyone to show that she is not fake and that she is genuinely there for Flavor Flav. Seezinz then takes a plate up to Flav’s room and tells him that she is giving him breakfast because she is showing him that she is there for him and not just to compete to be the winner. Then, for unknown reasons, Seezinz tells Flav that she is going to opt out of the challenge, and give up the chance to win a date that day (Damn, you could have tried to actually cook something if you were gonna do that).

The Neverwed Game

All of the girls are arranged in a room that is set up like a game show set. Flav comes in and tells the girls that they are gonna play a game based on their honesty and the validating words of special guests; and that the winner, will receive a solo date with him. Flav also informs the girls that Seezinz will not participate in the challenge; to which, Thing 1 states her discontent by claiming that Seezinz should “at least attempt to participate in the challenge”.

Next, Flav introduces Arsenio Hall who will be the host of this challenge. Arsenio tells the girls that they will be playing the “Neverwed Game” and that they will be playing the game with their ex-boyfriends. All of the girls -except Seezinz- are extremely nervous about this.
The game will be played in 2 rounds and the girl who has the most points overall will be the winner of the date. The girls playing in Round 1 are Thing 1, Prototype, and Tree. Now the exes are introduced.

Thing 1’s ex is Calvin (a big, shady looking guy). Thing 1 is very unhappy about seeing him and says that he will try to sabotage her chances because he’s a ‘hater’.
Next is Prototype’s ex, Jamal. Flav describes Jamal as a “straight-laced guy who looked like he walked out of the Cosby Show” (You wished you looked like him).
Finally it’s Tree’s ex, Mark (A depressed looking soul with extremely large lips). Tree is elated to see him and has no worries about the challenge, now.

Now the questions start!
The first question is “What would the ex think that your biggest body flaw is?” Thing 1 says that she thinks her ex didn’t like her “chi-chi’s” (What the hell is that?) (actually, it can mean bourgy)… but her ex says that he didn’t like her feet because she had peanut toes (LMAO).

Prototype answers the question by saying she thinks her ex thinks she has no body flaws; but her ex says that he didn’t like her breasts (I know he ain’t talking when he look like he drew his fade on with a ruler and a Sharpie). Tree answers similarly, but on this occasion, ther ex agrees. Flav doesn’t truly believe that this is true (SMH… he’s one to talk about body flaws), but Tree gets one point for this question.

Question 2 is “When was the last time that you made whoopee?” (Had sexual intercourse) Tree says that is was probably 5-6 months ago but her ex says it was 7 months ago. Arsenio jokes that the last time wasn’t very memorable (Umm…ok whatever).

Prototype answers that the last time was about 4 months ago and her ex confirm it to be true. Thing 1 then answers the question by saying that their last time was 4 months ago but her ex says that she gave him oral sex a month ago. Flav can only answer this revelation by saying a very loud and resounding “Woooooooow.”

Thing 1 denies this story and says that it’s nasty and that she wouldn’t do anything like that (I thought you were supposed to refrain from sex before going on a show like this). She also calls Calvin a ‘hater’, again. Prototype earns the point for this question.

The third question of this round is “What was the reason for the break-up?.” Prototype says that they broke up because she was jealous that Jamal had so many female friends and was ultimately unable to trust him. Jamal agrees that Protoype did not trust him. Tree answers the question next and she says that she left because she believed that they were not meant to be as ordained by God. Her ex also agrees that this was the reason for their break up. Flav is impressed that Tree is getting so many answers correct.

Thing 1 says they broke up because she wanted to come on the show while her ex says that she broke up with him so she could go after Flav’s money. Now Thing 1 says that ‘Calvin the Hater’ (I’m starting to dislike the word hater) is still lying and that he needs to shut up before Flav starts to think that she’s a liar. Tree and Prototype get points for this question.

The final question for this round is “What was the worst lie that the girls have ever told?” Prototype says that she never lied to her ex but Jamal says that Prototype would tell him that getting phone numbers from other guys is ‘networking.’ Prototype affirmed that it was strictly for business and that she never gave those guys her personal phone number. Her ex called her business-phone her “pimp phone” (She isn’t stupid, you know you supposed to get another secret phone to be the pimp phone).

Tree answers the question by saying that she never lied, and once again, her ex agrees with her. I’m not sure how Thing 1 and her ex answered this question but they didn’t agree on this answer either. Tree wins the point for this question and the round with three (3) points. Black questions how Tree and her ex could get so many questions correct (Because Tree still has a vice grip on his balls?).

For Round 2, Sinceer is paired with her ex Lemuel who she describes as still being cool with her (He wasn’t that memorable). Black’s ex is Brian and she says that they dated for 2 years before she discovered that he was cheating on her (What? They couldn’t get Terrell Owens to come? Damn!).

Finally, Thing 2’s ex, Kenneth, walks in. Kenneth and Thing 2 dated for 6 years and Kenneth is 21 years older than Thing 2 (Are the twins pulling an Ambre lie because that man looks like he could be Flav’s dad). Thing 2 describes Kenneth as being the man that she lost her virginity to (Ewww, I didn’t need to think of a man that looks older than my grandfather having relations with her. Just damn!).
The first question of this round is ”What would be the one word tattoo that the ex would use to describe the girl’s personality?” Sinceer says ‘beautiful’ but her ex says that she was a ‘diva’. Black answers that her ex would say that she was ‘crazy’ , and he affirmed the statement by calling her a ‘psycho.’ Thing 2 answers her question by saying that she was ‘loving’, but her ex says that she was ‘fun’. Black gets the point for this round.

The second question is “What was the reason for the break up?” Sinceer and her ex agree the relationship ended because he moved. Black says that they broke up because her ex thinks that she is crazy and her ex agrees and calls her a stalker (Damn girl WTF?). Black said she did drive by his house “a couple of times (A couple dozen times maybe).”

Thing 2 and her ex agree that they broke up because Kenneth cheated (So we can assume that he uses Viagra then right?). All 3 girls receive points for this round.
The final question of the round is “What would be the reason your ex came on the show.” Sinceer and her ex said it was because she loves Flav. Black and Thing 2 also answered that they came because they were looking for love but their exes say that it’s because they wanted to be “famous” and get “exposure”.

Flav is very upset with Black at this point by saying that she has 3 strikes against her because she is a liar, a stalker and she is trying to be famous (Who isn’t at this point?). Sinceer gets the point for this question and she is tied at 2 points with Black for the winner of the round.
Flav announces that Tree is the winner of the date and that they will be going out immediately.

Tree Date

Before Flav and Tree go on their date, the girls heckle Tree about her shirt -a see-through shirt that barely covers her breasts-, and as they see Flav off, Flav tells the girls that he will have a mixer with all of them and their exes -including Seezinz’s ex.
And, he adds, there will be blood an elimination after the mixer.

Tree and Flav go to Stevie’s Creole Restaurant where they discuss the obvious similarity between Tree and Brigitte Nielsen, and the real possibility her ex may still be in love with her. Tree explains that she felt that Mark wasn’t the one for her and that he was the only man that she ever broke up with. She assures Flav that she no longer has feelings for Mark.

Upon returning to the house, Flav assembles the girls in the backyard to tell them that he needs to find out if all of the things he has heard from the exes, are true. Seezinz is nervous until she finds out that her ex Reese is the one who shows up (That fake Chance look alike. He looks more like a black Twizzler not a Reese cup).

The rest of the guys are outside as well and soon everyone heads to the bar to mix drinks. This upsets Prototype even further to the extent she takes Flav aside and in the mansion, to tell him that she doesn’t like a man who drinks because her father was an alcoholic. Flav understands Prototype’s concern but he still feels that he shouldn’t have to stop drinking.

Next, Flav goes to talk to Thing 2 and her ex, Kenneth, who persistently calls Flavor Flav, “Flamer Flame”, and Flav wstes time trying to correct him with little success (had Flav called himself Flamer Flame 20 years ago then his new nickname would be Crispy Crisp now).
Meanwhile, Seezinz pulls Thing 1’s ex, Calvin, aside, to try to get to the bottom of the oral sex story. Calvin once again stands by his story and says that the incident happened a week before she came on the show (Will somebody pull this dusty, broke down looking mofo to the side and tell him that Thing 1 couldn’t give him oral sex if she tried. She would surely need to use a vacuum cleaner with a hose to attempt that).

Thing 1, Thing 2, and Sinceer go to confront Seezinz and Calvin while Tree uses this opportunity to go explain to her ex, why she left him. (wtf, did she leave him last week?)

While the twins yell at Calvin and call him a hater and a liar, Seezinz goes to tell Flav that Calvin says that the story about Thing 1 is true and that she is only trying to look out for him. Flav tells Seezinz that he has taken that information into consideration and that she should try to forget about the situation.
Flav beckons Thing 1 and Calvin to him, but both stand by their respective stories.
Thing 1 confronts Seezinz once again and calls her a classless liar (You call Seezinz classless but your ex looks like Michelin man after he went past the 100,000 mile mark). Thing 1 and Seezinz get into a huge argument, but Flav only seems to notice Tree in conference with her ex (I would tune out all that arguing too).
He wonders if Tree lied to him.

Finally, Big Rick steps in and exclaims that he is sick of all of the arguing and that they are “disrespecting his man’s house.” He asserts the exes need to leave whilst the girls get ready for elimination (Damnnnnnnnn Big Rick).
Once in the house, the twins and Sinceer take another opportunity to confront Seezinz. They call her fake and throw all of her things out of the room they shared (They were all sharing a room in the first place because…). Seezinz calls then childish and immature, but she does not fight them, and cries while she collects her belongings. (’I felt like mollywhoppin’ those heffas. Fa real)

Elimination Ceremony

At elimination, Flav gives his speech about how hard these decisions are, but before he gives away his first clock, Seezinz asks if she could get something off of her chest. Seezinz approaches Flav and apologizes to the twins and Flav, saying that she was wrong and that she doesn’t usually act like that. The twins brush off her apology but Flav accepts it and gives her the first clock. (’Aren’t they the same Twins who are now cool with Sinceer, who did the same damn thing they accuse Sinceer of doing?)

Next up is Black, and Flav tells her that he doesn’t think that she’s a liar (You gotdamn hypocrite).
Sinceer and Tree get their clocks next. Now there are 3 girls left and 2 clocks.

Flav calls on Prototype and tells her that he will not stop drinking and partying for her so he eliminates her (That’s straight up bullshit. That alcohol is really fuckin up your rational mind and killing your brain cells by the thousands). Prototype (Maria) is a little upset about getting eliminated.

Finally, the twins remain… and Flav, Sinceer, Thing 1 and Steupz begin to cry because it is inevitable that one of them will get sent home. Seezinz gives a look of indifference while claiming victory that one of the twins will be going home. (I love the way she stands at Elimination. She is so pimp)

Flav calls both twins to him; -it really is an emotional scene that matches yesterday’s Rock of Love elimination- and tells them that he loves them both. He says he knew the day would come where he would have to split them up and he tells Thing 1 that he believes her story. Flav then tells Thing 2 that he is keeping her (WTF? Just tell the damn truth). The twins hug and say their goodbyes and Thing 1 (LaTrisha) is upset that her ex had something to do with getting her eliminated.

Thanks for reading – Enigmatic Anonymous


Pictures Courtesy VH1