Rock Of Love Bus: Brittanya & Ashley Ex’ed Out
It’s like the closing stages of ‘The Apprentice’ as the girls wait anxiously to see who stays (Taya), and whose tour ends (Farrah).
Ashley cries at her new reality, she’s the only blonde among a bingo-club of brunettes. (I hope that collective noun catches on, because let’s be honest, brunettes are boring as fuck)
Anyways, it’s down to six women and they’re off to St. Augustine, Florida. Pronounced as St Augus-teen and not St Augus-tin. (Okay, Matic just told me you can say it either way depending on who says it and how it’s supposed to be said… ::serious stare::)
Finally the episode gets going when the girls meet Bret at the Casa Maria Hotel and are told Heather and Bret’s ex, Ambre will be seeking answers to the questions he can’t ask.
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(In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: The Ex’es, who investigate crime, and Bret, who prosecutes the offenders. These are their stories.)
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Meet The Ex’es
To add to the drama, the ladies ex’es were invited.
Mindy’s ex, Chris, is a decent-looking bloke. Taya’s ex, Jaz, looks like he’s from the Russian Mafia. Ashley’s ex James looks like an extra on ‘Prison Break’.
Brittanya’s ex goes by the name Royal T, so you know he’s a cunt. Jamie’s ex looks like Aaron Neville, and Beverly’s ex-husband didn’t show.
To prevent collusion or whatever, Bret takes the girls to a private room. Ambre and Heather remain behind to mingle with the ex’es.
And the ex’es are almost too ready for TV.
Chris tells Ambre he and Mindy watched every episode of Rock Of Love 1; which is just too weird. He thinks Mindy may have cheated on him.
Royal T says he and Brittanya ‘fucked’ a few days before the show, and Jamie’s ex hints at her being a groupie. (This is very familiar. All that’s missing is someone living with their ex and not having sex with him for two years)
But Jaz tops ‘em all. More on that later…
Meanwhile, Bret has taken leave from the ladies and is now in a room where he can observe them via video-camera. There he sees Beverly’s tantrum. Evidently, having your husband turn up and exposing you as an unfit mother is a good thing.
Back with the lads, James is confident, “Bret can’t pull my bitch. Nobody can pull my bitch” (Who can resist that charm?)
The mingling ends and it’s now time for the formal interrogation.
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Devious Fucking Bitches, I Tell Ya
First up is Jamie, in a gold, sequined lame’ headband. (Not even John Mc Enroe, Bjorn Borg or the cast of ‘Beat It’ could make that look cool, so who da fuck are you? Just stop!)
Heather asks where they met and it turns out she follows his band all over America, doing “a little something for everybody in the band” (Wtf?)
Outside Ashley is going ‘mental’. In fact, she wants to leave.
John tells her to chill out and Bev says at least she has someone who’s shown up…
“Who I live with dumb-ass!”, confesses Ashley. (:::whistles::: )
(Is that a good thing or a bad thing? After Daisy, I’m not so sure)
Needless to say, the ladies are shocked.
It’s time to move on though, and it’s Jaz and Taya.
Earlier Jaz had described Taya as the only ex he can’t see himself strangling. He then went on to describe his other ex’es as “devious fucking bitches” (Ambre’s ’serious stare’ after his rant is priceless)
But he remained calm as Heather questioned Taya. She got Taya to admit she has a 9yr old son (Having see her vagina, my guess is he was already 8 when she gave birth)
And she confessed to being a burlesque dancer.
“You’re still a stripper!”, Heather corrects. (Anyone else notice that Heather is a tough-bitch on ‘Rock Of Love’ and a sad cunt on every other show? Weird!)
When Heather adds that she’s been told by others that Taya looks down on strippers; Jaz goes off.
He says that’s ‘bullshit’ and shouts, “show me the girl -who said that!” (Da Hell!?)
As Ambre tries to clam him down he asks her to be quiet “with your stapled-ass extensions in your head” (Da Fuck? Hahaha!)
Next is Royal T and Brittanya. It was just an act with these two.
After a manufactured argument over who told who they can fuck the other, Brittanya ended up throwing a punch. Two punches, actually.
Both missed. So she tried spitting at her. (SMH!)
(In the reality tv world, women either throw a drink, an object, a punch; or spit. Heather is the only person to have done three. But Brittanya is the first to spit and punch)
Bev’s interview is anti-climactic, but she reveals she “got pregnant at 17″, and her ex-husband has custody of their three children (I could say something bad, here. But really, it doesn’t make her unfit because her husband has custody)
Mindy’s interview was comfortable and honest. And then came Ashley, the anti-Mindy.
She and James live in Vegas, and when pressed, admit they live together. But don’t sleep together, mind you.
At least that’s Ashley’s belief; James said “we sleep together all the time”.
He also states he’s not just here to fuck-up her chances, but to take her home. (She lives with you, dummy. She was always gonna come back home)
And he reiterates, “nobody can pull my fucking bitch”
Looking on, Bret says “your girl got pulled.”
He (Bret) then speaks privately with Ambre and Heather. Ashley & Britt receive bad reviews, but Beverly is neither here nor there.
They like Jamie, think Taya is poised, and Mindy?
“Love her, Love her!”, they chorus.
It’s now time for elimination…
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Elimination
After a portentous one-on-one with Ashley, Bret gets down to business.
Mindy, Jamie and Taya are selected in order, thus confirming them as the ‘new’ favorites.
Beverly is given a third second-chance, but Brittanya’s aggression is just too much for Bret who ends her tour.
Ashley feels relief and reprieved.
Holding her tour-pass, Bret asks if she can open her heart to him… she fails to answer.
Bret is now convinced, “I thought so. Your tour ends here”

Honestly, I personally don’t like Farrah, Brittanya, or Ashley, but I’m thinking after next week, this show is going to get real boring.. real quick.. and ya’ll know how VH1 likes to stretch out the final 2-3 episodes.
I’m so glad Trashley is gone. There was nothing remotely attractive about her from her personality, to her stank attitude, to her fake breasts, to James name tattoo’ed in the most obvious place ever. The fact is Trashley and Farrah did make out together than with Bret. She acted like nothing but a spoiled trashed girl all of the time and I have no idea how Bret said she was one of the prettiest girls he had ever seen.
Brittanya, although, would be ultra-hot all the time if she never talked and lost the cheek piercings.
I think he’ll keep Beverly (what a fucked-up name for a lady under 60-sorry, no offense to our golden friends that post) around for the final 2, just for TV. I think he thinks Jamie’s too much of a fan & is not looking for love, and she’ll leave soon. Poor Taya; I keep having bad visions of beef curtains whenever I think about her…bad vag will be her demise. IMO he’ll keep Mindy, because he kept Jess and he kept Ambre.
Yep…I think it will be Mindy!
ROFL@ beef curtains….awesome metaphor.
I’ll miss Ashely! That bitch was fucken hilarious. I wish they showed her arguing with Ambre in the “court house”.
Her man looked kinda scary though. Like a cholo.
YES ROYALTY IS A MAJOR ASS!! IVE HAD HIS SITE FOR A LONG TIME DUNNO IF ANYONE POSTED IT YET BUT ITS http://WWW.MYSPACE.COM/ROYALTYTHEKING CHECK HIM OUT CALLING BRET RACIST!!!!
BTW THIS IS MY FIRST POST BUT IM ON HERE ALL THE TIME!!!
Thanks Roch3ll3
I’ll check it out and maybe write a post on it
Man ashley was gross she had a man voice and was white trash and her boyfriend just proved that she was a weak woman she just acted like she as something…i cant believe someone so fake…i dont know those are the people that just get on tv to get famous…but didnt deserve the little fame they are getting…shes pathetic
From the first two episodes, I thought the only attractive women were Mindy, Beverly, and Taya, in part because they were not total idiots. I thought it said something about the lack of class of the group that by the second episode it was apparent that one of the more reasonable and mature women on the show was a Penthouse Pet. That’s a pretty weak group!
I laughed every time Ashley bragged about how beautiful she was and how much Mindy and Beverly looked like guys.
The one thing that strikes me about Bret is that he can’t decide if he wants a wife or a groupie. If you’re looking for a wife, then you don’t take your date to a strip club. Since he did, I don’t think he’s actually seriously looking for a wife or a long-term girlfriend.
It’s obvious he doesn’t want the groupie type. He picked two laid back, normal type chicks (Jes, Ambre) over two more party type girls (Heather, Daisy). And now is final four is Jamie, Bev, Taya and Mindy. He definitely wants normal-ish girls.
I see Mindy as the only one without major baggage, but that’s not much of recommendation.
And Yes, it will be less fun without Ashley.
LMFAO @ Royal T trying to get fame off of the ROL3 jus because he was on one episode
He needs to try out for ILNY3. I’ll love to see him and Sis p go at it.
That fugly bastard is selling T-shirts? wtf? He’s such a loser.
i know rite; he wasnt even a part of the CAST
lmfao and he claims Bret Michaels is a racist??
I think this guy is gonna throw his hat in the race and try out for Real Chance of Love 2
::SPOILER ALERT:: dont know how reliable this is but when meet the cast first came out on vh1 blogs a commenter added “none of these girls win anyways! he brings in girls at the end like FOL3 and a girl named Jaime takes it all” dont know how much truth there is in this but it was pretty accurate when the show hadnt even aired yet. the comment should still be there…
I am highly disappointed if this is true
how do you go from Gia—> 2 —> Jaime *LAME*
EWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Jaime is disgusting and I bet she wrote that.
Taya FTW!
Even though I think he will choose Mindy.
Taya; smh
::saggy vadge::